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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
missbinch

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yourplayersaidwhat

Bear Wrestling

yourplayersaidwhat

So Im gunna be in a campaign with my roomate as the DM and he wanted to meet with us to explain how the NPC who brings us together finds us. Im playing as a third party class made by a friend of his (hybrid of monk and druid) as a Dhampir

Me (OOC): I want him to find me wrestling a bear.

DM: No a bear is way stronger than you, just no.

Me (OOC): Lets go right now!

DM: Fine but if you die you have to make a non-dhampir character

4 turns and 7 damage later.

Me: The bear needs to make a DC 30 save to not die from my Coup De Grace.

Fails

Me: HAH I KILLED THE BEAR.

Dm: goddammit

ltfrankcastle
tozbraks tozbraks

everybody: hugh, bring your big ass muscles over here and punch this guy on screen
hugh jackman, quietly: i just want to sing

serenne-personal

Could I please have a high school musical remake where mature student Hugh Jackman goes back to college/university to get a new degree and is immediately headhunted by the school boxing or wrestling team or something like that and he’s just quietly there, getting his BFA in Musical Theatre

tozbraks tozbraks

thank you for the only addition to this post that matters

casasstrophe
gulag-nietzschean gulag-nietzschean

I LEARNED RECENTLY THAT PLATO WON THE GOLD MEDAL IN THE OLYMPICS FOR WRESTLING THREE TIMES. THIS PUTS A NEW PERSPECTIVE ON THINGS. I ALWAYS IMAGINED PLATO TO BE FRAIL AND MISSHAPEN BUT HE MUST HAVE BEEN FRICKEN RIPPED. I WONDER IF ARISTOTLE EVER FELT ANXIETY ABOUT GETTING PHYSICALLY (I.E. NOT JUST METAPHYSICALLY) DISMANTLED BY PLATO. PLATO WAS PROBABLY PISSED OFF BY AT LEAST A HANDFUL OF QUESTIONS ARISTOTLE ASKED HIM. ARISTOTLE WAS A LITERAL GENIUS TOO. IMAGINE PLATO LECTURING AND WRITING ON A BLACKBOARD AND ARISTOTLE THROWING A COMMENT OUT THERE ABOUT SOME COMPLEX MISSTEP IN PLATO’S LOGIC AND PLATO’S CHALK JUST SNAPS AND ARISTOTLE’S TESTICLES SUCK WAY BACK UP TO WHERE THEY DROPPED FROM, THEN PLATO WITH APE-LIKE AGILITY APPEARS BESIDE ARISTOTLE SITTING AT HIS DESK AND HE PICKS HIM UP AND SUPLEXES HIS MACEDONIAN ASS.

mymindpalaceiskindaweird

So Plato was the Hemingway of the classical Greece

bibliochor bibliochor

He would be, except Plato actually seemed to think women were people.

Source: rangordnung
enlightened-introvert

I love that all quartzes have raspy voices, even Holly Blue. 

 I also love that they’re all super strong and buff and the all have floofy hair. 

 I love that Amethyst’s wrestling persona is a big, buff, hairy dude and nobody has a problem with it.

 I love that Rose Quartz is also big, buff, and chubby and she’s still regarded as super attractive, and that, despite being dainty and pink and floaty, she still has a raspy voice and punches things when she gets frustrated. 

 I love that Jasper, an angry big, buff cheeto puff that is an antagonist but not the MAIN one still has an interesting and complex backstory and we’re likely to hear more about her later. 

 Honorable mention: I LOVE Bismuth’s design, she’s so big! She’s not conventionally attractive, yet little dainty Pearl was flirting with her all day. I LOVE THAT!!!

Source: enlightened-introvert
quartz-appreciation-society
enlightened-introvert

I love that all quartzes have raspy voices, even Holly Blue. 

 I also love that they’re all super strong and buff and the all have floofy hair. 

 I love that Amethyst’s wrestling persona is a big, buff, hairy dude and nobody has a problem with it.

 I love that Rose Quartz is also big, buff, and chubby and she’s still regarded as super attractive, and that, despite being dainty and pink and floaty, she still has a raspy voice and punches things when she gets frustrated. 

 I love that Jasper, an angry big, buff cheeto puff that is an antagonist but not the MAIN one still has an interesting and complex backstory and we’re likely to hear more about her later. 

 Honorable mention: I LOVE Bismuth’s design, she’s so big! She’s not conventionally attractive, yet little dainty Pearl was flirting with her all day. I LOVE THAT!!!

enlightened-introvert

Ooh! I just saw this post again, and  I have to add that I love that all the Quartzes have their own personality in their voices and it isn’t just the same gruff, grating voice with different VAs, if that makes sense. Like, even among the Amethysts, they have their own tonal qualities, even with the same VA and similar personalities. It’s not just “buff chicks get rough voices” they actually put some thought into it. 

Source: enlightened-introvert
thebestoftumbling
draumbooty

My buddy used to know this guy in high school that would watch porn before every wrestling match he was in. He didn’t beat the meat. Didn’t even play with it. Sat fully clothed and watched violent ass hardcore for like half an hour.

He won almost every match.

Turns out being sexually aroused with no satisfaction makes your testosterone go into overdrive and turns you into a fuckin beast for like 15 minutes.

I do it now everytime I go to the gym. Never had better workouts.

swedebeast

Imagine being the guy figuring this out for the first time.

draumbooty

if you dont nut you unlock superpowers kids

mrlevelingthinner mrlevelingthinner

having a raging erection while wrestling is also a great form of psychological warfare

Source: draumbooty
enlightened-introvert

I love that all quartzes have raspy voices, even Holly Blue. 

 I also love that they’re all super strong and buff and the all have floofy hair. 

 I love that Amethyst’s wrestling persona is a big, buff, hairy dude and nobody has a problem with it.

 I love that Rose Quartz is also big, buff, and chubby and she’s still regarded as super attractive, and that, despite being dainty and pink and floaty, she still has a raspy voice and punches things when she gets frustrated. 

 I love that Jasper, an angry big, buff cheeto puff that is an antagonist but not the MAIN one still has an interesting and complex backstory and we’re likely to hear more about her later. 

 Honorable mention: I LOVE Bismuth’s design, she’s so big! She’s not conventionally attractive, yet little dainty Pearl was flirting with her all day. I LOVE THAT!!!

Source: enlightened-introvert
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